5 Easy Chronic Pain Self-Management Skills

Today I want to take a slice of Pete Moore’s Pain Toolkit and share it with you. Who is Pete Moore? He’s a chronic pain warrior who came up with this incredible Pain Toolkit to help others struggling with chronic pain. Here’s the website: https://www.paintoolkit.org/ . The truth is, we can learn to self-manage our chronic pain. Like Pete, I have also learned to do so to a point where, yes I have pain, but no it does not affect my day-to-day life (that’s not to say I don’t have bad days, heck I had bad pain the other night and had difficulty sleeping). One thing we want to do when we have chronic pain is cultivate resilience. Now, I’ve written about resilience before in the past, so I’m not going to go into detail here. For those who aren’t familiar with what resilience entails, here are a few things: optimism, self-belief, willingness, self-control, being able to adapt, psychological flexibility, problem-solving, emotional awareness, social support, and humour, to name a few. So, here are 5 ways we can learn to do this.

Doing these things helps me manage my chronic pain.

1. Goal Setting and Action Planning – I often set goals for myself, even on days that I’m not feeling great. In our third atmospheric river (basically several days of torrential downpour) since November in BC, Canada, I’m again feeling it in my body. But I know my body also needs to move. So I set a goal for how far I will walk in the rain (which is less than my goal would normally be but appropriate for the weather, my body at this moment, etc.). So, set your goals, and prepare for barriers to them. Here’s a podcast episode I recently did on that.
2. Engaging in Activities of Daily Living – Getting out of bed, having a shower, eating breakfast, etc. All the regular stuff we do in our lives. It can be really hard to want to do them when you have an illness or pain, but doing them can also improve our overall well-being. Check out this episode of the podcast for more.
3. Problem Solving – Problem solving can include a lot of different things. Pacing is important and I’ve done a post on that (December 1), prioritizing and planning your days, and really importantly, having a setback plan. What are you going to do when things don’t go the way you planned (in your goal setting and action planning stage). When I was recovering from hip surgery last year, I had to problem solve how to do all of my daily activities because I couldn’t put any weight on my left foot (for 6 weeks!) and I live alone. I still had to figure out how to cook, shower, dress, and even get to some appointments.
4. Be Active – this will mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people, but it really means to move your body. It could be walking, exercise/going to the gym, stretching, yoga. Exercise itself is an evidence-based treatment for chronic pain (here’s the podcast episode). It can be light movement, as long as it’s movement. I can’t go a day without moving my body. Even when I notice I’m having the thought that I don’t want to move or I’m in too much pain, I inevitably actually feel better if I go for a walk or do some restorative yoga.
5. Be patient with yourself – offer yourself some compassion. Change is slow. Like it’s an average of 10 weeks for someone to start noticing differences (in their minds or bodies) when they start to make any changes. If you find you’re having difficulty being patient with yourself, try this mindfulness exercise. I’m definitely guilty of wanting change to occur quickly for myself. But interestingly, when I offer myself patience and compassion instead of criticism, change seems to actually occur more quickly than when I’m only hard on myself.

Remember, change is slow.

I hope this helps you with some pain management. I know it’s things that have helped me and many others. So, just keep making the most of it!

How to Manage Your Chronic Illness Through the Holidays

Let’s face it, we all stress through the holidays. It’s rarely an “easy” time of year for anyone. Over the years I have spent many holidays working in retail; I have had to share time between families (back when I was married); I’ve had to spend some Christmases all alone. And then there’s all the things we normally have to do like cook, and clean, and buy gifts (sometimes with limited money) and almost always with limited spoons (for those of you who use Spoon Theory). How can we be expected to manage all of this? And many of you may not handle it well. So, here’s what I’ve learned.

Do you like my Star Wars Ugly Christmas Sweater?

The most important thing to do is PACING. For those of you unfamiliar with my blog post on Pacing earlier this month, it basically comes down to doing the same amount of activity every day (so no over-exerting) regardless of how you feel. What usually happens, especially at this time of year, is we have a good day so we go ham and do as much as possible on that day (cooking, cleaning, etc) and then we end up not being able to do anything for day(s) after. If we do just 1 activity on that “good” day and then also do just 1 activity the next day, regardless if we feel better, the same, or a little worse, we will more easily avoid a string of “bad” days.

My only physical activity on this particular day in 2018 was ice skating.

The other most important thing is setting boundaries. Who says YOU have to host dinner? If you do host dinner, then maybe you don’t need to be the one to cook (can everyone bring a dish?) or clean by yourself (if you have a partner, can they help with the cleaning and prep). When shopping for presents, have you done it online? If you do have to go to the store, just use that as your 1 activity for the day (and wrapping the presents being an activity for another day). Tell your support system what you can do, and what you need help with. Stand up for yourself and don’t let them bully you.

It’s okay to say no, even if you have to say it to Santa himself.

If you don’t have a strong support system, which I know sometimes happens, then again, revert back to pacing, and say NO if you can’t do something (again, this could be hosting dinner, cleaning, etc), and see what other help you can get. Maybe there’s a neighbour or friend you can pay to help you cook or clean (that way it’s less expensive then hiring a professional). We need to use some flexible thinking and get outside the box.

I also recommend cuddling with your pet (if you have one) as they can help to reduce stress (RIP my little Spike).

The holidays are stressful, so we need to do what we can to manage our stress levels and take care of ourselves, while still living by our values (and hey, self-care may be one of your values). Have a Happy Holidays and keep making the most of it!

Support my content on Patreon.

Video: Pacing & Action Planning for Exercise

https://videopress.com/v/av2lsTh9?resizeToParent=true&cover=true&preloadContent=metadata

If you’re thinking about exercising to help with your chronic pain or overall health, it is important to consider two things: (1) pacing – so that you don’t over exert yourself one day and pay for it the next; and (2) action planning or goal setting so that exercise is realistic for you. Also, remember to always talk to your healthcare team before starting any new exercise routine! If you’re having thoughts about your ability to exercise that are causing you distress, check out this podcast episode.

Keep making the most of it!

Support the show on Patreon!

What’s the Difference Between Chronic Disease Distress & Depression?

Despite my educational and practicum background in counselling, I hadn’t heard the term “chronic disease distress” before I attended the World Pain Summit this past October. When we think of mental health issues in relation to chronic illness and chronic pain, only anxiety and depression come up. This makes sense since the rates of anxiety and depression in those with chronic illness are slightly higher than in the general population (reports vary exactly how much, and it does depend on the condition). Learning about chronic disease distress, I realize that’s actually what I had – not anxiety – when I was first dealing with my illness and attended therapy myself. I don’t know what my therapist would have defined my condition as, but I fit the description better than anxiety or depression.

During the hight of my chronic disease distress I had the best support (RIP).

What is chronic disease distress? This is distress that comes with the stress of having a chronic health condition. It has some overlapping symptoms with both anxiety and depression, which can include anxious (catastrophizing) thoughts, rumination, sadness and crying, difficulty sleeping, etc. In CDD this is more related to the illness itself, rather than other areas of life. Now, that’s not to say that it doesn’t impact other areas of life. Having a chronic illness clearly does, but the distress all relates back to the illness at the end. If you’re able to go into remission or get a handle on your physical symptoms so they are less impactful, typically the distress goes down as well (the distress itself can also be treated but I’ll get to that in a moment).

Chronic Disease Distress doesn’t have to last forever.

What is depression? Clinical depression (major depressive disorder) is a set a symptoms that include, but aren’t limited to, feelings of sadness, worthlessness, guilt, loss of interest in activities, difficulty sleeping, difficulty with thinking, lack of energy, thoughts of suicide, and so on. Not everyone who is depressed has clinical depression (you can have some symptoms but not enough to get that diagnosis). Depression is a world wide epidemic and has a significant impact on people’s lives.

Image from: https://theconversation.com/depression-its-a-word-we-use-a-lot-but-what-exactly-is-it-122381

Some researchers have come up with a scale to measure chronic disease distress. This scale includes measures for emotional burden (of the illness), regimen distress (lifestyle impacts), patient-provider distress (medical gaslighting would fall in this category), social support distress, and then a total score. Only a qualified mental health professional can diagnose any mental health condition. Personally, I try not to worry too much about a diagnosis (unless a medication is warranted) and otherwise focus on the symptoms and distress facing you, me, or anyone else.

What do we do about chronic disease distress? Obviously seeking counselling/therapy from a qualified mental health professional (preferably one who specializes in chronic illness) is going to be the best route to go. Otherwise, certainly self-help sections in your library or bookstore, or listening to podcasts on the topic are good ideas. Support groups as well can be very helpful. In the meantime, personally I find mindfulness a good place to start. There is a lot of evidence of it being helpful (plus I’ve personally found it helpful!). Mindfulness doesn’t have to mean meditation, but if mindfulness is the muscle, meditation is the best exercise for the muscle. I have formal (meditation) and informal (non-meditation) mindfulness practices on my YouTube channel.

Image from: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2014/01/07/260470831/mindfulness-meditation-can-help-relieve-anxiety-and-depression

I hope this helps you understand the difference between CDD and depression. If you have questions, feel free to reach out. For now, keep making the most of it!

If you like this post and/or my other content, considering supporting it on Patreon (and get some cool perks too).

Video: Daily Mindfulness – Guided Light Imagery

This week’s mindfulness activity is a guided meditation that uses imagery of light to help us centre, ground, and sometimes it can even be relaxing. Notice what comes up for you while you do this practice. For more guided meditations, subscribe to my YouTube channel.

I appreciate any support you have for my content on Patreon.

Critical Coping: Problem-Focused vs. Emotion-Focused

I used to always use problem focused coping. Like 99.9% of the time. And it usually served me well, but not always, and certainly not always after my chronic illness snuck up on me. Then I started to use more emotion-focused coping, a totally different coping style. And here’s the thing, I now use both and you probably need to as well. But hold on! What the heck are problem-focused and emotion-focused coping anyway?

Image from: https://www.verywellmind.com/forty-healthy-coping-skills-4586742

Problem-focused coping is typically used for solvable problems, ones that can be fixed, and make the problem go away. For example, if we lose our job due to company restructuring (this happened to me back in the day) then we would use problem-focused coping in order to find another job and make sure we can support ourselves in the meantime.
Emotion-focused coping is what we use when the problem can’t be fixed, and the problem will not go away. It is dealing with emotions that arise from an unfixable problem. Kind of like what happens when you have a chronic illness.
Both of these skills are necessary in life, but the problem is, most of us are taught more about problem-focused coping that emotion-focused.

Problem-focused would be how to get out of the canyon you and your friend went hiking in.

Let’s look at problem-focused in the context of chronic illness or chronic pain. What are some solvable problems or areas in which we would use problem focused coping? Well, lifestyle changes are one area. We are told or we read up on different “diets” or exercise routines or incorporating meditation, etc that will help us with some of our symptoms. Or maybe it’s just taking medication as prescribed. We would use problem-focused coping because lifestyle changes and medication adherence are fixable problems. We’ll likely use SMART goals (specific-measurable/meaningful-attainable/adaptive-relevant/realistic-timebound) or other techniques to make these changes. And, while nothing is a guarantee, there is a lot of evidence supporting that certain lifestyle changes will help with symptoms, essentially “fixing” (I use that term loosely) the problem.

Emotion-focused is more about accepting emotions and pain.

How about emotion focused coping in the context of chronic illness or chronic pain? While, chronic disease distress, anxiety and depression are all common in those of us with chronic illness. Our illnesses likely won’t go away and our emotions – well, we’re meant to have them. So with this I see a lot of acceptance practices being used and needed (here’s a link to one of my favourites). Self-compassion is another area where we are utilizing emotion focused coping (here’s a link to one of those practices). We have to learn to live with difficult emotions that come and go, and difficult sensations, such as pain. If you’re not good at this, I want to normalize it for you – most people aren’t! This is a skill set most people need help with.

It is essential for people with chronic illness to have both types of coping skills.

Who can help you add these skill sets? Well, there are lots of places to go. A counsellor/therapist or health coach is one place. I would say the health coach would help more with problem-focused and therapist with emotion focused (as well as problem-focused). You can also look in the self-help section of your local library or bookstore. Those meditations I linked are another place, and I’ve done a number of episodes on these in my podcast (check out this episode on acceptance for example).

Once you have and start using both types of coping skills, you can start making the most of it!

Support my content on Patreon.

Video: Daily Yoga – Sphinx Pose

https://videopress.com/v/ir6PbocK?resizeToParent=true&cover=true&preloadContent=metadata

This week we’re exploring one of my favourite yoga poses. I find it to be a great stretch for my back as well as my chest as it acts as a back bend and chest opener. Make sure to check with your healthcare team before doing any new exercise routines. The information in the video is based solely on my experiences. Stretches can be great for pain that is muscular – check out this podcast interview with Dr. Yass about muscular pain. As always, keep making the most of it!

Support my content on Patreon!

Video: Daily Exercise – Cleaning

https://videopress.com/v/QGDo5y69?resizeToParent=true&cover=true&preloadContent=metadata

If you never thought of cleaning as exercise, I’m about to blow your mind. So we all know that movement is important. And when you have a chronic illness, even getting some light exercise in daily can be extremely beneficial to your health and overall wellbeing. Cleaning is a great way to do that. Sweeping, mopping, scrubbing, taking out the garbage…you’re literally moving your whole body while you do these chores. This is one of the places where changing our outlook on something can really help us! If you’re feeling a bit hopeless about where to start or about whether you can do some cleaning for exercise, check out this podcast episode on creative hopelessness.

Hopefully you can get your body moving this week and keep making the most of it!

Support my content on Patreon.

Your Repression of Emotions Can Affect Your Health

I know this is a bold statement, but honestly it’s not one that I’ve come up with. It’s one that’s been studied, and it came to my knowledge through the form of a book – When the Body Says No by Gabor Mate. Now, I have done a whole post giving my review of that book awhile back, so that might be something you want to check out before or after reading this today.

Image from: https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/when-the-body-says-no-the-cost-of-hidden-stress_gabor-mat/249909/item/4440329/?gclid=CjwKCAiAm7OMBhAQEiwArvGi3Be6FKxo_K4KAZncIWrAyof02dWHX7KniIKrUqB8qGh28YJtsz9ebxoCRaAQAvD_BwE#idiq=4440329&edition=3547012

First things first, I want to reflect on my own life. As an adult I wouldn’t say I repressed my emotions. Well, sometimes, when I was in my 20s, I would repress anger until it boiled over and spilled out like. Then I was accused of having ‘anger problems’ but really, looking back I was just not expressing it as it came about. On the other hand, sadness, joy, etc. all seemed to come out appropriately. Diving further back, I know there was a time between the ages of 8-13 that I repressed emotions – again, usually anger. Through those 5 years I had a group of friends at school, and one girl in particular was good at manipulating the others into not talking to me for periods of time. Like I mean I had no one to hang out with at school when they did this. It started as just being a day, then a few days, then a week, sometimes a month. It was honestly unpredictable of when it would happen and how long it would happen for. I never knew what ‘I was doing wrong’ and was always only told by them, “If you don’t know, then I’m not going to tell you.” I think this was actually a traumatic experience for me. Actually, my therapist told me it was. However, this post isn’t about that trauma, it’s about repressing me emotions. I think the only way I could get through 5 years of elementary and middle years schooling was to repress. Not show any emotion about it at school. I remember crying myself to sleep at night, but certainly not every night. Luckily, I was enrolled in a ton of extracurricular activities which probably helped me too.

I think I was 6 in this photo.

What does repression of emotions have to do with chronic illness? Well, in When the Body Says No, Gabor Mate explains that repression of emotions – particularly anger – has been linked to several illnesses. These include autoimmune diseases, cancer, and ALS. Now, this doesn’t necessarily mean EVERYONE fits the bill, but certainly, in my conversations with others, people readily admit they have difficulty expressing anger in an appropriate and healthy way. Very interesting.

I was first diagnosed with autoimmune in 2016.

Why does repression of anger cause chronic illness? Well, in and of itself, it does not. However, when we look at illnesses from a biopsychosocial standpoint (this is the mostly widely accepted view in the medical community – both Western and holistic), it is a contributing factor stemming from the “psycho” portion. Bio stands for biological – so any genetic or epigenetic (meaning our genes were changed by our environment) – contributions to illness. Psycho stands for psychological contributors, which can also include personality, management of emotions, how we handle stress, and so on. Social usually relates to the environment, which often includes factors like traumatic events.

Biopsychosocial model of illness (physical & mental).
Image from: https://www.physio-pedia.com/Biopsychosocial_Model

What can we do with this knowledge? For me, the best thing I’ve learned to do is appropriate and consistent expression of emotions. This means I don’t ‘boil over’ with rage but rather can notice and accept the feelings of anger, expressing them through words. This is sometimes referred to as emotional regulation, and in my practice it definitely falls under acceptance. There are many ways to learn to do this. The most effective would be going to see a therapist. There’s also the self-help section of the bookstore or library. The practice of mindfulness. Just to name a few. Will doing this help heal our illnesses? Well, not exactly, but it can help lessen the severity and impact of our symptoms on our lives. I think it is a part of the healing process we often neglect, but really shouldn’t. This week’s episode of the podcast talks about acceptance (find it here). If you have questions about it, feel free to DM me on Instagram (@chronically.living_)

Learning to express our full range of emotions – anger, sadness, joy, nervousness, etc. – is important to our overall well-being (just watch the movie Inside Out if you’re not convinced).

Keep making the most of it everyone!

Support my content on Patreon.

6 Ways I’m Managing a Weather-Caused Flare (+ 5 More Ways I Could)

Long title, I know. But nonetheless I thought I’d share some of my tips with you, plus a few other evidence-based ones I found online as I’m trying to get through this. I’m writing this exactly one week before it will be published so fingers crossed that it’s over by the time you’re reading it, but if not, then I’ll just have to accept it as it is. My flare is likely caused by a few things. First, I recently moved and moving is stressful (even a relatively easy move like I had) and stress can cause a flare. Second, I moved from a dry climate in the interior of British Columbia to the wet, lower mainland of BC. I always notice my symptoms, especially pain gets worse when it rains… but then I knowingly moved to a rainy climate (*face palm*). All jokes aside, my symptoms are increased pain, increased fatigue, really bad jaw pain, my left foot is super veiny and sore (my calf is fine though so unlikely anything super serious). How the heck can I manage all of this?

Even on a flare I’ve managed to explore my new neighborhood.

1. Acceptance. Yes, I know some of you are rolling your eyes or saying that this is ridiculous or unlikely to work. But I find it does. I accept that my pain is here, while knowing that the intensity changes hour by hour, sometimes even minute by minute, and I know that when my flare is over I’ll go back to baseline. Acceptance is helpful. I’ve been doing body scans and other mindfulness activities to help with the acceptance, but honestly just acknowledging my experience without getting wrapped up in it is helpful. Check out this acceptance practice.
2. Exercise, Movement and Stretching. If you read this blog regularly you know that I like to exercise. And I still pace myself by trying to stay consistent with what I do. I definitely increase my stretching during flares. Particularly I focus on the areas that seem to hurt or need it the most. For example, my jaw is the worst today as I write this, and I’ve made sure to do jaw stretches throughout the day. For more on jaw pain specifically, check out this podcast episode with Dr. Shirazi.
3. Warm Baths. I LOVE my baths. I literally take a bath 4-5x a week in the winter months. And with the rain, I’m definitely needing them. They help relax my muscles, keep me warm, and are very relaxing. Trust me when I say I could never (and would never) live in an apartment without a bathtub. Knowing what is vital to your self-care is essential to dealing with a flare. Check out this podcast episode on it.
4. Dressing Warmly and in Layers. Vancouver, if you’ve never been, is a city where everyone dresses in layers. It will likely rain at some point during the day, though you never know exactly when. It could also start off cool and warm up, or vice versa. So I’ve been making sure to put on 3 layers when I go out, and have a pair of mittens on me. I need to remember a hat and/or an umbrella, but I’m working on it!
5. Hydration. I tend to drink a lot of water. Admittedly more when I’m working. Staying on top of my water intake is so important to managing my flares and really my health! I’m trying to drink 5 full glasses of water a day minimum. I basically keep a glass of water next to me all day and every time it’s empty, I refill it. Listen to my podcast conversation with Beau Berman about gut health and how important drinking water is to him.
6. Omega-3’s and Vitamin D. I typically try to get these from the foods I eat. Lots of fish mostly (rich in both), as well as mushrooms, spinach, avocado and tofu and really a variety of others foods are rich in vitamin D. These are really important for reducing inflammation naturally and honestly are just really good for you! Also, Vitamin D is a way to combat with the “winter blues” (which I often get) and the more severe, Seasonal Affective Disorder.

Image from: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/323144

So those are the 6 things that I am doing, but what are the 5 things that I’m not but probably should be?

1. Acupuncture. This is actually an evidence-based and recommended treatment for chronic pain. I’ve had it in the past and I’m hoping to start back up with bi-monthly sessions next month. Listen to the podcast episode on recommended treatments for chronic pain for more info.
2. Massage. I miss getting massages. It’s been nearly a year since I had one, and this is also a service I used to get bi-monthly. I’ll likely also start these back up soon as well. Clearly I need to. The benefits of massage can be heard in the podcast episode with Danielle Potvin.
3. NSAIDs. I’m not a fan of these drugs to be honest. They can cause stomach problems when on them long term. I’ve drastically cut back on them and only take them to supplement the more natural medications I take (i.e., CBD). If you’re aware of the risks and find them helpful then this can be a helpful solution.
4. Natural supplements. The only natural supplement I currently take is magnesium bis-glycinate which is a muscle relaxant (and I mainly use it when I’m menstruating). Other recommended supplements are fish oil, ginger (which I sometimes have in food and/or tea), turmeric (which I sometimes have in tea), and gingko. These are definitely worth checking out to use in addition to some of the other suggestions.
5. Limit Stress. Oh I can’t wait until I’m passed the stress of the move and starting up new counselling practices. The truth is there is always some kind of stress in our lives and it really comes down to how we manage stress. I typically do a good job with mindfulness, meditation, yoga, and relaxation practices. So this might just be a reminder to do a bit more of that. And also, if you are able to avoid stress then that’s a good plan (I do not plan on moving again for quite some time!).

Taking it easy on Halloween. Needed some time to relax after the move.

So that’s it! 11 ways in total to manage a flare. Keep making the most of it everyone!

Support my content on Patreon.